I realized this week, I am so tired. Not unhappy or depressed. Just worn out after some intense work weeks and busy weekends. So this weekend consists of a lazy Sunday. My sister and her boyfriend were in town which always lifts me up no matter what…..because anytime I get 10 minutes with my sister I am happier. She is truly (and will always be) one of my favorite people on earth. A hug from her is the best!
So even with that boost as she left this morning I was still worn out. I slept longer and later. And I was a bit hard on myself for being so tired. I was thinking how will I do this when I have kids? My work is just so intense. I am the only executive with a working partner and will be the only one with young children (god willing I have kids). And then I realized I use to say…how will I do this with a huge job? Or how will I still have space for me and a big job and maintain a serious relationship? And these questions resulted in solutions and answers that ended up working out. And I started thinking….I need to relax.
We are rivers and as long as the river is running….it keeps flowing. We keep going. Adapting. Still owning our own unique energy flow. Still standing alone and strong. Sometimes merging with other rivers but still owning our own unique curves and ways through the earth.
When I’m tired, I just need to rest. Pretty simple. Slow down, sleep or cancel plans and just rest. I just slow down the river to a stream of energy and enjoy the things around me. Refuel. I don’t need to quit…I’m still moving forward on the same path. Just pumped the breaks. When you go white water rafting or canoeing, you always enjoy the quiet moments. You stop paddling and just look at nature. So you have that energy and excitement for the intense rapids. The river seems to find spots to allow you to do this.
I said to myself– Don’t forget that you’re human. It’s okay to have a meltdown (not my mood today but some days). Or be exhausted and be lazy. Or want a day to be a homebody. Just don’t unpack and live there. Cry, sleep, or “introvert” it all out and then refocus. Slow down the water flow in your river…become a bubbling brook and then let the water flow back out to a strong flowing energy source.
Sometimes my river (i.e. energy) will be intense, high energy, and lively. And some times it will be chill, minimal, and calm. It is all about just making sure it doesn’t get stuck in one place. Just keep the river going and it will vary in terrain and water flow.
Own each stage. Don’t worry about the rapids around the bend. Just own it and enjoy. Let yourself have lazy days or weeks even. One of my favorites Maya Angelou has a great quote below.
Are you allowing your river to change along the way? Is it always super intense and high rapids? Or it is always low key and streaming along? How are you navigating your own path?